Could be that he’s just spoken to her once or twice and you are freaking out because of that. In that case, you should try building trust in your relationship instead of fretting about your boyfriend talking to his ex. It’s easy to think your boyfriend is having an emotional affair, especially if your relationship is going through a rough patch.
Emotional Needs in a Relationship: Building Stronger Bonds
The first thing you should do when your best friend is dating your ex is to take a step back and re-evaluate what is happening. When the reality of what is happening may be much different, or may not actually revolve around you. When you hear the unexpected news of your ex’s and your friend’s new romantic entanglement. It’s completely natural to feel betrayed, angry, and hurt by them both. So, even if your intentions are not malicious in any way, it is best to steer well clear of talking about anecdotes of you and your ex together.
Unless their relationship recently ended or they became friends, you probably have nothing to worry about. Still, you’ll have to deal with occasional jealousy, and it might even upset you when your partner mentions your friend. If their relationship recently ended, you shouldn’t get involved with this person anyway, but even if it ended long ago, you might fear that they still have feelings for each other.
He tries to get in touch with her and she’s secretly thrilled
You can ask your girlfriend to decide what she wants. If she wants to move on with you, then it is better that she cut off completely with her ex. But if she wants to get back, then she needs to break off with you. Although this article is about dating the best friend of your ex, you can follow the advice and it’ll still work, even if you’re in this situation. If your friend is dating your ex, it’s really important that you all practice clear communication with each other.
Before you assume the worst, lose your cool and dump him right away, take a breather. We know you have a whole lot of questions in your mind. Why does my boyfriend still talk to his ex every day?
Then during covid we were apart most of the time . This did not help as I was fairly cautious but he wanted to carry on having illegal gatherings at his house. So at Xmas he didn’t even invite me- I had to ask to be invited then after being totally ignored I threw my dummy out of the pram and left. Zoe It was the final straw after 10 years of being a good girlfriend who never complained even when he wouldn’t come to my family events because he would prefer to be in the pub. Now I find out he has moved her into his house after a few weeks. We never lived together properly for 10 years !!!!
It is thus important to be careful about what you say and how you say it. If you just got a green signal from yourself to proceed with this connection of dating your ex’s best friend, it is now time for a thorough think-up! Always remember that sometimes our decisions play no role to be right or wrong. It’s the TIME who decides everything and makes things work.
But the loss of a friendship that I truly thought was loyal, really hurt the most. Right after I got dumped from my ex, I told my friend all the details of my recent breakup and how I hoped things would work out in the future with my ex. One week later, I unpleasantly discovered that my dear friend was hanging out with my ex. I was more upset with my friend then with my ex. The fact that he couldn’t man up and have the courage to tell me is what’s most upsetting. And after reflection, I’m now aware that he has a long history of going after mutual friend’s exes (6-8 different occurrences).
You need to fully consider what maintaining a healthy friendship with them will look like moving forward. Knowing the facts from them both may help you see their new relationship from another perspective. It may help you realize that it’s less about them trying to hurt you, and more about the genuine feelings they might have for one another. If you feel like talking things through with them both will help you better understand the feelings you are having. Then talk to your friend to see if you can all hang-out together. Talk to your other friends, and your family about your genuine feelings on the matter.
The former may not be so harmful, even though your insecurities are starting to kick in, while the latter may be the reason why your boyfriend’s pulling away from you. For you to find out whether your boyfriend’s ex wants something from him or she’s just being friendly with him, there are some questions that you have to ask yourself. It’s difficult to tell whether it’s normal for your boyfriend to talk to his ex behind your back. Life is filled with tough choices and if that friend chooses to date your ex, they should be ready to live with its attendant consequences.
Be happy with yourself and your circumstances, and be happy being alone. In any case, thanks for all the good work you do. Your blog sustained me through one of the most difficult times in my life and helped me grow immensely.
Seriously, it’s not like I can test my friends loyalty, how do I know who my real friends are, and the ones who are friends out of convenience. Recently, I (22/f) found out that one of my best friends (21/f) had been dating my ex (22/m) behind my back for a good while. She told me the truth only after they had already made things official between them. She didn’t seem to feel that bad and even started to argue with me. I am not sure if I should ever be friends with her again.
Kate is devoted to helping others through personal growth and transformation, success in dating and romance, and healing and rebuilding after a breakup. She is also a member of The Biofield Institute, the Healing Touch Professional Association, and the Energy Medicine Professional Association. Kate holds a BA in Psychology from San Francisco State University.
